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Purgatory

from BLEAK by The Green Leaves

/

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    Deforestation EP
    BLEAK
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    The Great Loss - Split EP w/ Aberrant Construct

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lyrics

In this purgatory the only guarantee is compounding
dissatisfaction and lack of understanding of what
surrounds me without any comprehension of what
I could have possibly done to deserve to be sent to
this endless purgatory
It's dumbfounding.
Imagine for a moment, the same split second,
separated and serrated inserted into your psyche
The same moments being relived repeatedly.
Unbearably unavoidable, your eyes forced open to look
into the endless tunnel that is the abyss
The same moments being relived repeatedly.
Do I deserve this?
Do I deserve this dreadful, pitiful existence,
stripped of all purpose?
If I do deserve this, what have I done?
I seek understanding almost as much as I
seek freedom.
Time is a foreign concept to me, space is
also a mystery.
I lay still and feel myself drifting away, almost a
sense of serenity...
Only to be attacked by these vile, uncontrollable
thoughts that rip me from a nearly meditative
state and plunge me into a crushingly downward
spiral where my chest aches from the intensity
of my heart beating.
As I fall endlessly into the nothingness, I can feel
The pulling and plucking of my muscle fibers
In a harmonious and agonizing orchestration
reminiscent of the strings of torment on a piano.
Temporal and spatial boundaries have been dissolved.
I've resented myself for being born my whole life, I've
hated my current state of being tossed around this
hamster wheel, and I abhor the thought of a future
that's just the same.
No end.
Relief, from this
Never, will I ever feel.
No end.
No relief.

credits

from BLEAK, released July 27, 2018

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The Green Leaves Fort Wayne, Indiana

Summit City Slambient

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